New York City, thank you for having me.

As a child, I at one point developed the notion that New York City was the penultimate location for all of my hopes and dreams. In fact, the allure of Field Work Term and the potential to spend seven weeks in New York City was one of the reasons I decided on attending Bennington four years ago. Although my previous three Field Work Terms were absolutely satisfying as I learned to navigate the art world back home in Chicago, I grew increasingly anxious as I approached senior year and New York City still felt like a pipe-dream. Without financial support for my family, the generosity of friends, and connections & emotional support of the Bennington Visual Arts faculty, this winter would not have been possible, and I am forever grateful for everyone who made this winter a reality.

In planning for my final FWT, my only (very personal and not expressly shared) requisite was to work with women who are immersed in and occasionally challenging their field. Having spent three winters working primarily for men in the art field, I thought that as a female artist I needed to seek out female mentors in my field. And I found excellent mentors in each of the women I worked with. All three of these ladies worked very hard to get where they are at, even going against the grain at times to get what they wanted. The perseverance of all these women in their fields was incredibly inspiring as I prepare to leave Bennington, where being a woman and attempting work is only met with incredible amounts of support by friends and faculty. So having found valuable mentors and learning their stories the past 9 weeks has been an invaluable experience.

This was really the first gallery experience I had where I was able to be so hands on and involved in the daily operations of the gallery. In addition to learning how to put together press packages, artist bios, and update artworks in the computer system, I was able to expand upon my skills as a artwork documenter photographing a performance by Alejandro Guzman. Every day at the gallery was an invited challenge, just when I rediscovered my comfort zone A or S would throw me a new task. Both A and S provided excellent guidance and all this newly retained knowledge is incredibly useful as I begin to plan for the future and hopefully find myself within a gallery or museum setting once again.

Working with Nancy was just a total dream, all-in-all. It was my first time really working for someone and not occupying a shared space with them at least a few times a week (though we really genuinely tried!). In our final weeks, the trek down to Dumbo became an escape from the general roughness of New York. Nancy's studio became a safe haven for ideas, seeking advice on adult-life-artists-dreams, a space for mapping out potential life scenarios post-graduations, conversations about commitment and cohabitation, gushing over the minds and work of great creators, and occasionally space for blasting Madonna while getting work done. I had a blast working side-by-side with Nancy, and I feel more collected and confident regarding my future as a result of it.

Despite the general roughness of New York and a few incongruous experiences, NYC was very kind to me. I had the opportunity to attend an opening for Charles Marville at the Met and the press preview and opening of What Is a Photograph? at the International Center for Photography. I met a handful of the photographers whose work I have admired for years. Friends and family visited on several weekends and sharing the city with everyone was such a special experience. The amount of art I had the opportunity to take in was incredible, and I could not have had the same opportunity anywhere else.

All in all, I am walking away with positive feelings towards my NYC experience. Although I probably won't find myself settling there right after college as I had first thought, I do believe that New York and I have a future together at some point, and that the connections, skills, and overall confidence I developed this winter will be what brings me back.

week 7, a bit late.

I accidentally forgot to document my final week on this blogspace, but I think my absence says it all. My final week was a bit hectic (work, gallery openings, press previews, fitting in as many trips to the doughnut plant as possible), I was finally caught up in the full bustle of the city that I forgot that my staying here was only temporary.

Nancy and I were extremely productive in the studio. The seeds we spent the winter researching were finally planted, we transformed her space by installing what might possibly be the world's largest mood board, and Nancy dove right in to various movement / miming exercises. Needless to say, the final week was very physical and it prepared / excited me for returning to my own studio space back in Vermont.

And at the gallery, I finally felt as though I pulled things together-- new skills for navigating the various systems used, knowledge about the represented artists and current shows, and general familiarity with the area I was working. I built upon the art-handling and administrative skills I have acquired at my previous gallery internships, but also learned a whole new skill set working within a gallery of this caliber. Working the front desk has been a real pleasure in terms of being able to have a lot of face time with various individuals from artists to collectors to tourists.


Xx,
A

when things aren't as you dreamed them.

The theme of this week is keeping busy. Between kicking things into gear with Nancy at her studio, preparing for the opening of a new show at the gallery, an opening at the Met, and an opening / press preview (^^^see above, crazy, right?!) at The International Center of Photography (ICP) -- not to mention a whole list of personal tasks, events, and guests, I've been extremely preoccupied the last week. And it's a good thing. 

To be honest, I have not loved my New York experience. I have loves my experiences -- openings, seeing art, poetry readings, visits from family and friends, and the occasional sunny day perfect for walks through SoHo and Little Italy. But overall, I am not as in love with this city as I was before living here. And I am okay with that, I'm actually really glad I figured that out now before maybe committing to live here post-Bennington.

But New York has been worth it. The connections I have made, the new skills I have learned, and the macgyver tactics I have inherited from these witty New Yorkers. I don't get lost (as much). I've learned which groceries stores are best for what. And to pretty much avoid buses / taxis at all costs. I've had the opportunity to follow the work of some of my favorite artists at various institutions, and in my FWT roles I feel as though I have acquired some pretty impressive mentors. Overall I am satisfied with my New York experience, and finally settled. But I am excited for this final week to come and go, and to bring my new skills back to Bennington, back into my studio, and finally beyond Bennington.

Positive bits about the last week// the candlelit stairs at the Met opening, a slow dinner at ABC Kitchen, comfortable shoes (finally!), first outing to Bushwick, seeing Liz at the ICP opening (and meeting some artists who are total superstars in my book), diner burgers, french philosophy books, artisan tea shops, yoga, visits from M (and his mom!), and sunny afternoons at my favorite coffee place on Jane Street.

Xx,

Autumn

lighter.

This is the view of my workspace on a sunny day, when the light hits the window a certain way around 3 o'clock. This silly iPhone photograph does not do justice to the amount of green light reflecting into the gallery space from a piece we have in the window upfront. It's precise moments like this, a break from sorting emails and scrutinizing artist bios for accuracy, to admire the spectacular light filtering into the gallery. It's moments like this where I am humbled.

To be honest, I started off this FWT a little disappointed and incredibly anxious. I had initially been offered a position at an institution which really excited me; but unfortunately due to timing and circumstances out of my control, the opportunity fell through. This moment and the weeks to follow were disappointing. I had finally earned what I had worked so hard for, only to have it fall through my grasp and continue to be the dream it has always been.

But then I found myself sitting behind this desk, the hustle and bustle of Chelsea between 10th and 11th street bustling around me. This is the dream, and I am living it. I am handling work by artists I admire, I am learning more about the politics and logistics of galleries, and I am constantly being introduced to new work and new artists; all of which is exciting. This winter, even in its lowest moments, is deeply humbling. I've met many people who's work and rigor I deeply admire, I attended an intimate opening at the Met last night (and was easily the youngest there), I am attending another opening later this week for artists who I admire incredibly, I am working for a kick-ass Brooklyn artist who has me challenging my own ways of thinking creatively, and I am immersed in the world I have always dreamed of being a part of.

Lately, I am incredibly thankful for// natural light, a weekend spent with family, being invited tot eh Charles Marville opening at the Met, hot tea, M coming to visit for a weekend, seeing the work of artists which I admire, great scores at the Strand, silly interactions with street photographers, running into old faces in this big city, slow meals, good books, perpetuated creativity, and having a few weeks left in this crazy place.

working for a living.

This past week was one of the most challenging, exciting, exhausting, and stimulating yet. Between two full days at the gallery, a very busy opening at Eyebeam, documenting an opening for the Jules Olitski Foundation at Tower 49 and a performance at Susan Inglett Gallery (where I am interning), and a full weekend with the grandparents while Nancy is away on business, I am exhausted and welcoming the snowy weather keeping me indoors today.

The past week was intense and New York City is really proving to be quite formidable. Maybe it's the gray, the sluggish nature of the C train, missing my family, or the constant sirens and swarms of people everywhere, but this week I think I fell a little out of love with New York City, or out of love with the idea I had of the city. Maybe this all sounds more bleak than it is; maybe I am finally settling and am finally living the dream I had built up in my head for so long. I'm working for a kick-ass female artist, a reputable gallery representing exciting artists in Chelsea, and have plenty of free time to explore this amazing city. But I'm missing my studio and the greenery. I'm missing the ability to produce work and the unlimited access to the darkroom. But the struggle I am in is quite lofty and I know that I will be alright. I am just a girl experiencing the city of her dreams, and it is okay to not be 100% in love with all that I am doing all the time. It is just like the work I create. Sometimes it lives within me and sometimes I just need to get away from it. This past weekend certainly helped with that, I was able to escape the city I know for a more relaxed, slow-paced weekend with my grandparents taking in MoMA, Broadway shows, slow meals, and quite evenings in their hotel room. It was the refresh that I needed.

This coming week proves promising as well; two days at the gallery, class on Friday, then the weekend and an opening at the Met with my boy. Everything this girl needs to feel more at home and at place in this big, big city. 

The best part of the past week included: slow meals with my grandparents and their friends, documenting Alejandro Guzman's performance at Susan Inglett Gallery, sampling Pho from various eateries around the city, handling work, a walk on the High Line, lunch breaks with a good book and warm food, the fresh snow, and seeing new parts of the city.

a little more slowly.

This week has been about keeping it local. Memorizing the streets and faces around my own neighborhood. Brief walks past discarded Christmas trees to pick up pho from the Vietnamese place on 110th & Amsterdam. Long mornings spent in bed nursing this sickness with hot tea. This has been my slowest week in New York, so far, but maybe this is what comes with settling.

I did make it out beyond the Upper West Side for work at the gallery last week, mostly sorting through emails, continuing spreadsheets, and updating some artist folios. Even though it is only my second working week at the gallery, I already feel more in-touch with the artists and collection; and it is very exciting to be in with such good company. 

The research I've been doing for Nancy has kept me occupied while sick. Essentially, I've been watching a lot of television and movies, either in full or in clips, and pulling scenes where women are  either defying or subverting female archetypes in very physical, active ways. In the past two weeks, I've had the pleasure of watching Mulan, Resident Evil, I Love Lucy, Bringing Up Baby, Indiana Jones, etc. This research has really excited, but as a result I find it more difficult to watch some of my favorite shows where the woman protagonist is ported as a typical female archetypical role.

Aside from work, getting well, and class (we explored art spaces all over the SoHo on Friday!), I have devoted a large chunk of time to developing my own personal work, and I am very excited to get back into the studio/darkroom in just a month. 

Other bits from the last week include: enjoying large quantities of pancakes, finding two great pho places, spending more time with my film cameras, only having to wait an extra 30 minutes for the Megabus to Providence, attending the most delightful wedding in Boston with M, mapping out some potential ideas for senior work, touring SVA's photo/video graduate facilities, free yoga, and long evening walks in this delightful weather.

grounded.

Almost a month into my internships, and I am finally finding my pace as I settle into various little routines. Late morning walks with hot coffee and a fresh brioche from the cafe around the corner on my days off, quiet walks to the '1' or 'C' train clutching my Canon and latest read (currently: seeing is forgetting the name of the thing one sees by Lawrence Weschler) before heading to the day's coffee shop (typically in the West Village, Chelsea, or SoHo) so I can spend a few hours doing research before taking in shows at galleries near 23rd Street, visiting Walter De Maria's Earth Room, or venturing out to the Brooklyn Botanical Garden. I am enjoying the rhythm of New York City; the anonymity of it's patrons and of myself as I explore and immerse myself in this new space. 

On uncharacteristically chilly days (like the last few); I willingly trade my excursions for afternoons spent researching in the strips of sunlight fleeing through blinds, bottomless cups of looseleaf tea, and winter-appropriate playlists.

My current research for Nancy has me totally elsewhere: island paradises. Currently researching famed islands, whether for historical, environmental, or pop-cultural reasons, my afternoons are spent swimming in the history and images of Lemnos, South Bourgainville, and the Pearl Islands. Though all these places are so far away, everything feels more tangible since arriving in the city. 

With all of the struggles of adjusting to a new space, a new routine, and a new set of responsibilities, there have been so many triumphs. Weeks of online and field research on indoor gardening finally led to the installation of a new lighting fixture in Nancy's Dumbo studio earlier this week. I am slowly becoming more familiar with the gallery and its surroundings. I get lost riding the train less often. I find joy and discover new things in those moments that I am lost (like the most delicious cream puffs while wandering home one night after work). I am constantly searching for and being ambushed by inspiration for my own work and for the work I am doing for Nancy. 

I am extremely grateful to all my professors who made securing my FWT positions possible, my best friend and her family for putting me up for two months, the constant sunshine these past few mornings, slow starts at my breakfast place near the gallery, sunny lunchtime walks on the High Line, being surrounded by great art, the opportunity to see the work of my professors in galleries and museums, and for doing work that I find myself more invested in each day.